Reflections

Now, every day, a couple of times a day, I get reports from home about what the boy is up to. Melanie and I got to share a majority of Cole's first year with my being home for so much of it, about 7 months, so she makes sure that I don't miss out on those subtle changes that children have each day, those moments that, in sum, make the child.

So, it is one of those moments that I've been told about often, Cole's use of the windowsill for a wide range of purposes, and this particular day, it was his assembled collection of toys that he was studying. Not playing with, studying.

Melanie has described this aspect of Cole's personality, and his use of the windowsill as his workbench, to me many times. Through them, I get so see what she sees, experience what she experiences, so that I picture his actions in my head, her detailed accounts more accurate than a photo.


And, on occasion, she will snap a few photos of what he's doing, and I think that she often captures essences more than she catches moments.


Now, I'm sure most of you know that we marvel at his aptitude for engineering and his use of things for anything but their intended purpose.

And this, I'm sure, can be attributed to normal development or his being a boy, or whatever, but you still can't help but be amazed that someone who has only been alive for 18 months can do things like dismantle a kitchen timer. Not beat it apart, but literally, take it apart. First the dial, then the shell, then parts of the mechanism inside until he's figured it out. It often elicits a conversation like this when I get home:
"What's this?" I say, as I notice the pieces on the kitchen counter.
Melanie looks up briefly and says, "That's the timer."
I pick up the pieces.
"What happened?"
"Cole."
"Oh." I puzzle over the parts, wondering how they got together, then add,"Should I pick up another one?"


Understanding that most learning stems from observation and replication, we know that what our little monkey sees, our little monkey does, but there's the things children do that have no relationship to modeling, that manifest in them, seemingly randomly, that absolutely floor me almost every day with Cole. I can't help but wonder where it comes from, what remnant of memory, collective or individual, bubbled to the surface and slipped out like a long-lived habit in someone who just learned to walk.


And when I find myself reflecting on the mind-blowing concept that this person is part of me, parts of the people I love, and part of something I don't even have the capacity to fully understand, he'll turn to me, in that way that he does, and look at me like he knows and figured it out long before I did.

Father's Day Fun

A Collection

of Images and Thoughts on

My First Father's Day Up Nort'

So, this past weekend was Father's Day, and like all other guys out there lucky enough to be Dads, Pops, and the like, I enjoyed the adulation of my family and the exaltations regarding my fatherdom.

Seeing as how our little enclave of the Becker Clan is sort of isolated in this lakey state, Melanie made it a point that the day was a special one and helped Cole express some of his own pleasure about me being his Pop.

I was given the morning to sleep in and slumber in the relative quiet of our bedroom while the last touches were made to my hand-crafted, one-of-a-kind, completely-Coley-made gifts.

My first home-made card did not disappoint. It was crafted by both Melanie (she did have to help the kid a bit) and Cole, who drew the interior art. (A first time effort with mixed media or media of anykind that wasn't food.)

Melanie and Cole seemed to have had a great time working on the card. But the real work of art was the gift that I got from Cole. It was his first ever finger painting.

It was a whole day of first creations for the little man.

Melanie had picked up a couple of white tiles after inspiration struck her for my gift.

She dressed Cole up in an old t-shirt and poured six of his ten new fingerpaint colors into small dixie cups.

As soon as she gave Cole
the tile and paint, he was off and running.

You can see that our natural artist is quite serious about his work.

At one point, Melanie tried to adjust the tile on the table so that Cole could paint the less used portion at the top.

He looked at her like she was nuts and turned the tile back to the proper position for viewing.

Cole seemed determined to produce a specific vision that he had for his first modern impressionist work.

As soon as Cole was finished with his painting, he moved it aside and took off the t-shirt. He was more than happy to talk about his piece once it was finished and spoke at great length with his Mom about the subtle shading techniques he used and the types of finger strokes that produce the best blends.

After reviewing it these past few days, we have come to the conclusion that it might be his impression of the view from our back window. The grass and groundcover in the forest behind the house give way to open sky and flecks of blue. He tends to spend a good deal of his play time at the windowsill playing with his toys and observing the trees. Perhaps, he will let us know later on.

After some general fooling around, we opened our Father-Son gift.

We have been wanting to go for bike rides since he could sit upright. Until now we have only been able to go on hikes and stroller rides, and not much else.

But now, we have the means to take rides together. We got a bike trailer. Coley already knew where his helmet goes. Safety first.

He helped me unfold it and put the wheels on it in the living room. Cole's Mom was good enough to point out the difficulty of removing the fully assembled trailer from the house (after it was assembled). But we managed to get it out the door and hook it to a bike and go for a ride.

And let me tell you, that boy is getting heavy. He seems all light and stuff on the flats, but once we hit the hills, you start thinking about feeding him just a bit less. My theory is that as we ride, I will lose weight and he'll gain it, so we'll have a constant training weight.

Seriously, we had a great time riding together. Cole rode in silence. I didn't talk. (wheezed a bit, though) And, we found a neat little park just a couple blocks from our townhouse that we can use until we move.

The capstone for the whole day were the nice strip steaks that Melanie and I got to eat alone at the end of the day. Cooked just right, both with mushrooms, mine with crumbled blue cheese, and both with a baked potato. It was practically criminal they were so good.

Happy Father's Day to all.

Up From Indiana

What is better than hanging out with your parents all the time?

Hanging out with your cousins!

Just last week my cousins, Molly and Finn, came up with my Aunt Amy for a visit. I hadn't seen them is so long. The last time I saw them I wasn't even walking!

They arrived on Saturday, and we all headed over to the Como Zoo to see the sights, but the rain wouldn't let up, so instead, we went to the Mall of America. We didn't do any shopping; we just had fun in the amusement park inside.

We all rode on the merry-go-round together with my Mommy and Daddy.

Aunt Amy took pictures from the sidelines because she gets sick when she spins in circles.

Molly, Finn, and I have no problems spinning, though.

Finn can even do it while looking backwards. Too cool!

Molly had fun, too. She sat next to me and made sure that I held on.

There was a lot to see and do there. Finn got some new Thomas toys at the store near the merry-go-round.

We all got to use the potty there, and I got to help Daddy flatten pennies for his collection. We made lots of cool ones, with Minnesota animals on them and neat stuff like that.



Even though Aunt Amy gets icky when going in circles, she still went on the air ballon ride, which went in lots of circles. She seemed to like it though.

Molly and Finn rode together on the train in the center of the park.

They sat and talked to a little boy the whole time.




We all had dinner at a neat place called Johnny Rockets. We sat at a table overlooking the park and had hamburgers and milkshakes.

I had so much fun hanging out with them.

That night they slept over at our house. Molly and Finn got to camp out on the floor in Daddy's office, and I had to sleep in my own room because I'm still just a little guy, but soon, we'll get to all sleep on the floor in our sleeping bags just like my Daddy and Aunt Amy did with their cousins when they were little kids. I can't wait.

Even though we slept in different rooms, it didn't keep us from staying up late. It was lots of fun getting ready for bed. We brushed our teeth together, got our PJs on at the same time, we even got to do tub-time together.

(Daddy added the extra bubbles for modesty.)

We had lots of fun. We must have because there was more water on the floor than in the tub when we were done.

The next day, after my cousins got back from visiting Cousin Liz at her new house, where they had lunch and got to play in the garden with her, we all went to the Como Zoo.

This time the rain cleared up by the time we got there. I've been to the Zoo before but it was extra fun because I got to go on more rides because we all rode together.

Our first ride was on the sports car ride. We all drove. As you can see, Finn really liked it.

Eventually, Molly and I just sat back and enjoyed the view of the open road while Finn drove.

Then we headed over to another ride. This one was a magic carpet ride with genies and stuff.

This time I rode up front with Finn so we could talk about guy stuff. You know, boogers and things.

Besides, Molly seemed to be in her own conversation with the genie.

And then, Finn and I found this cool button. He dared me to push it. I, of course, did, and the whole ride shut down...

Just kidding, nothing happened. We just went in circles again.

We actually did go see the animals before the park closed. We saw those tall thingys again and the polar bears and the zebras and the lions and the ostrich and the leopards and the monkeys...no wait, that was Finn climbing around. He's cool.

We saw a bunch more animals and then we went home.

The whole visit was great fun, and I missed my Aunt Amy and Molly and Finn after they left. I kept looking for them all day, but they were on the long ride back to Indiana.

Hopefully, they'll get to come visit again, and we can do even more fun stuff up here.

Melanie's Birthday/Memorial Day Weekend

Last Wednesday Grandma Diane and Grandpa Dave came up to visit and to celebrate my 32nd birthday or Cole's 17 months depending on how you look at it. On that first day Cole, the grandparents, and I all trekked out to the Mall of America (MOA). As you can imagine we didn't stop much for photos but I did manage to snap a few of Cole with Grandma D. and Grandpa D. at Johnny Rockets while we ate a late lunch.

When we got home the big surprise was our power being out. Apparently while we were safely nestled in the MOA the outside world was enduring quite the rain/hailstorm. Plymouth was the hardest hit with 10,000 homes losing power. Just when Scott and I were starting to panic over lost groceries and having no candles or matches the power came back on. They had told us it would be out for 24 hours but it was actually only out for a few.


Thursday, the 24th, while it was still raining out Scott made me another breakfast in bed to kick off my birthday and the three of us enjoyed a lazy, cozy morning. Meanwhile Grandma D. and Grandpa D. hit the nearby outlet mall. They seemed to have much better luck there than at the massive MOA. We all met up back at our place in the afternoon and visited until it was time to head out to Wayzata for my birthday dinner. We went to a restaurant that I had hoped to take Scott to for his birthday brunch (Easter) but at the time weren't able to get into. Sunsets definitely did not disappoint. It's right there on Lake Minnetonka and there were dozens of sailboats enhancing the amazing view. The food was also incredible and we all left feeling full and satisfied.

Finally on Friday the sun came out and stayed out which gave us the chance to finally get outside! We went to the free zoo called Como Zoo this time and had a blast. The Como Zoo has more than just animals, it also has a conservatory,


and a sizable amusement park with plenty of rides for all ages and stomach ranges.


I myself love the spinny rides so Cole joined me for a twirl in the teacups and then Scott came on board for our spin in the similarly based pumpkin ride. Scott doesn't enjoy being spun and Cole was indifferent to the experience (although at home his favorite thing is to spin or be spun) so from there the boys climbed aboard the little kid train. Cole seemed to enjoy being able to see the other kids riding along as well and of course he always loves being with his papa.


Scott made a special trip down memory lane and started a tradition for Cole as well when he spotted the Mold-a-rama zoo animals being carried around by several little kids.

He managed to mold a blue polar bear and a gorilla for Cole. An excellent accompaniment to the flattened penny collection.



Here are some more pictures from our fun day at the zoo.






Cole loved seeing his Grandma D. and Grandpa D. again and he totally fell in love with their dog, Holly.

Mother's Day In Review

On Sunday we celebrated our first Mother's Day in Minnesota. Scott and Cole must've been planning our day for weeks because it was perfect. Even the weather seemed to be ordered in. Well, actually in the morning it was overcast but we're slow movers so by the time we were ready to greet the day it was outstanding! My boys woke me with breakfast in bed (on a tray even!) of french toast and hot white tea. Perfect! Then they presented me with my Mother's Day cards and the garden stone I've been longing for since Cole was born. Scott had Cole pick out the style and Cole took to the flip-flop style which means I really got two garden stones! They personalized it with beach glass (another of my favs) and of course Cole's foot imprint. That was enough for me right there but there was more!



After Cole snuck in a good nap (which gave me time to read - huge bonus) we headed out to the U's Arboretum. It's another one of the great places the library offers free passes to and I've been dying to go.

It seemed as though all the moms asked for the same thing because it was packed. It didn't feel crowded as you walked around though because the place is huge.


Based on what we've seen of Minnesota so far I think the state could give Texas a run for its money in the 'everything's bigger' category.

Cole loved taking in all the scenery and smells as much as Scott and I did. He even chattered away about some of the trees as he pointed them out to us. We understand a lot of what he's saying but he still only has a few good, clear words that are universally understood.

We know he'll be cracking us up all the time (he's already a great joke teller) but we also know we'll miss this stage once it's gone so we're trying to soak it up now until it's good and dry.


We spent a couple hours walking around and only lightheartedly tried to follow the guide map.

Scott wanted to walk over to the sensory garden but somehow we kept walking in the opposite direction.

Sometimes it was due to a great shot that we just had to take, sometimes it was because Cole wanted to go to the left instead, and sometimes it was just to get a break from the very warm sun.

We didn't realize until we got back and heard the weather report but it'd actually been 92 degrees out there!

With all those trees though you would've thought it was more like 80 - the breeze and the occasional waterfall is what saved us I think.

When we got home we played around for a while and then once Cole went to sleep Scott and I watched a movie. From beginning til end it was a perfect day. I hope all of you had a perfect Mother's Day (or graduation) as well! Congrats to Kate!